At least once a month, usually more often, I have to attend staff meetings. So I go, and two hours in, I’m regretting every life choice that led me to that point in space and time. Here is a partial list of the things that make me murderous at staff meetings, illustrated with gifs (via Giphy) from the hilarious TV show Bob’s Burgers:
- The people who come late: This meeting was announced way in advance. Why would you hold everybody ransom to your tardiness/indifference? Get it together.
- The side attractions and wannabe comedians: Some people cannot refrain from making random comments and interjections during business meetings. Why. Why disrupt the proceedings and make everyone stay longer at this thing we all hate?
- Those ones who bring up the same topic at every meeting: Do we have to keep talking about the same thing, over and over, until the heat death of the sun? This issue was discussed in the last meeting and the one before that. Let it go.
- Idiots who bring private grudges to the meeting: Oh my god. You could have resolved that issue with your coworker, either by talking it out one on one, or by a brief hashing-out with the supervisor, but nooo. You have to bring it up so we spend an hour yelling about who shouldn’t have done what.
- The point where it devolves into a shouting match: What are you doing. Why are you yelling in public?
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